Thursday, November 29, 2012

Unconditional Love?

Taylor's older brother, Cole, stopped by the house early this morning to collect something from his old room. Taylor stood like a sentinel at the bottom of the stairs calling up to him, "My brudder.  My brudder.  Hey my brudder! My brudder, hey!"  He must have called for his only---and his beloved--brother at least a dozen times before his voice was strong enough for Cole's reply to make its way downstairs.   "Good morning,  my brudder," Cole chimed---probably for the 200th time time this week that he had been summoned (with love) by Taylor.
    I heard it all from the bathroom sink.  It was so sweet. But for the first time this morning, it dawned on me---like really woke me up kind of dawning---that Cole has a person in his life who loves him unconditionally.  See, I have be aware for many years that I have had this very unusual kind of unconditional acceptance/regard/love from Taylor.  It had just never occurred to me that Cole also shares this rare blessing.
   If you are reading this (and I guess you are if you're reading this), you must already know how completely remarkable it is for another person to have this sort of "I love you for who you are---Because you are---no matter what you do or think or believe.  I just love you".  It is...well, it's what all of those self-help books are written about---but that very few  of us can achieve:  loving another person unconditionally.   Pretty dam(n) rare!

 No matter how much Cole (or I) might beat up on himself  for his perceived imperfections, Taylor's view of him is, “Nothing you become will disappoint me; I have no preconception that I'd like to see you be or do."  Whew.   It's just that plain. It's just that simple.   It's just that profound.
   I have to say that it is pretty disarming to witness  such a pure love  by someone who never tries to influence his brother; he does not set out to limit Cole's potential, nor does Taylor manipulate in order to persuade or change his only brother.  There is  none of that usual family business that often goes, "I love you. You're perfect. Now Change!"
    I guess that is why this morning, I went bounding after Cole shouting, "OMG! You have somebody who loves you unconditionally!  Do you know how lucky you are???"
    Lessons are being taught in my house and not by me. 
    Love is not something we must earn (I am learning).
Love is something we both give and  if we're lucky... that we are able to receive.
Taylor is doing his best to show us that love is infinite, boundless and sometimes.....unconditional.
I am a slow learner.
But, either way, Taylor's brudder is loved.
 Completely.
And I  get to see it as it happens.
Win/Win for sure.